PRIME SUSPECT - the evil Oscar Oscarton -well known collector of all things huge and furry.Max: Hi, Dirk Clawsout, Private Dick at your service. I am on the trail of the missing crown jewels, well actually my missing crown jewels. I have a number of suspects on my list, the main one being the Oscar cat, his reason - pure jealousy. He has been observed on a number of occasions taking an unhealthy interest in my rather wonderful malteser collection. He is unable at the moment to provide an alibi, other than - he was sleeping. My investigations have led me to his rear end whilst he was sleeping, however on inspection he has not hung them in the obvious place, but he would obviously have to have some VERY sturdy brackets made to hang them. I have checked under all of the beds and managed to get into 2 of the wardrobes, but the missing beauties have not yet come to light. My next step is to hack into his eBay account to make sure he is not trying to sell them on the black market. Got to dash, nut clusters to be found!
Summer: Max has been dashing around like a loon today, I have no idea what he is looking for, but he has been acting very strangely, following Oscar around and sniffing his bottom....uuuggghh boys are so horrid.
I have been sitting on my comfy cushion today and my mummy says I am like a little princess. I found some very strange string stuff stuck on my tummy on Saturday, so I spent the day very carefully removing it. I did such a good job that my mummy took me out in the car to show the people at the vet place what a wonderful job I had done.
When we got home my mummy put a big fabric tube over my tummy, which I didn't like at all, so every time she stood me up, I went rigid and rolled over. I pretended I couldn't walk, you should have seen her face it was so funny.
I went on my eBay account today and saw some rather nice pom pom earrings that are being advertised locally. They would look really nice on me.......I think I will just pop off and put a bid on them....bye for now.
Max: Did I tell you my sister has been totally useless as my assistant these past couple of days. The silly minx ripped her stitches out of her tummy. Then when she had a big collar put on her she started moon walking backwards and refused to eat anything, drink or use the litter box. So the blond slave made her a body stocking and when she had that put on her, she just rolled over and wouldn't stand up. She is such a Diva and a drama queen!!!!!! Anything to take the attention away from the missing pom poms of pleasure, in fact I think she may be trying to misdirect me and take the focus of the investigation. Right Summer Dancer goes to the top of my suspect list, she may be in it with the Oscar boy..........off to investigate further.
Dirk Clawsout signing off........going to to a bit more private Dicking
Summer: Max has been dashing around like a loon today, I have no idea what he is looking for, but he has been acting very strangely, following Oscar around and sniffing his bottom....uuuggghh boys are so horrid.
I have been sitting on my comfy cushion today and my mummy says I am like a little princess. I found some very strange string stuff stuck on my tummy on Saturday, so I spent the day very carefully removing it. I did such a good job that my mummy took me out in the car to show the people at the vet place what a wonderful job I had done.
When we got home my mummy put a big fabric tube over my tummy, which I didn't like at all, so every time she stood me up, I went rigid and rolled over. I pretended I couldn't walk, you should have seen her face it was so funny.
I went on my eBay account today and saw some rather nice pom pom earrings that are being advertised locally. They would look really nice on me.......I think I will just pop off and put a bid on them....bye for now.
Max: Did I tell you my sister has been totally useless as my assistant these past couple of days. The silly minx ripped her stitches out of her tummy. Then when she had a big collar put on her she started moon walking backwards and refused to eat anything, drink or use the litter box. So the blond slave made her a body stocking and when she had that put on her, she just rolled over and wouldn't stand up. She is such a Diva and a drama queen!!!!!! Anything to take the attention away from the missing pom poms of pleasure, in fact I think she may be trying to misdirect me and take the focus of the investigation. Right Summer Dancer goes to the top of my suspect list, she may be in it with the Oscar boy..........off to investigate further.
Dirk Clawsout signing off........going to to a bit more private Dicking
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